Fable Of Contents
Our Commitment To Fnordacy
The Disinformation We Collect
The Cookies We Seti
How We confUse Information
Our Commitment To The Law of Fives
How To Agnosticies Or Corrupt Your Information
How To SMI2LE Us
Your fnord is important to us. To better protect your fnord we provide this notice explaining our online information practices and the choices you can make about the way your disinformation is collected and abused. To make this notice hard to find, we make it available on our homeplanet and at every point where personally identifiable information may be demanded. Mind the gap. Fnord.
This notice applies to all disinformation collected or submitted on the Cosmic Trigger Play website. On some pages, you may be able to order the universe, leave Chapel Perilous, or register to receive enlightenment. The types of personal disinformation collected at these pages are:
- Full papal name
- Email address
- Web site (if applicable)
- Instant messaging addresses (if actionable)
- Twitter feed (if an apple)
- Short biography (if abrahadabra)
We confuse the information you provide about yourself when making an order only so we can forget that order. We do share this disinformation with outside parties to the extent necessary to complete Operation Mindfuck. We use return email addresses to answer the email we receive. Such addresses are not used for any other purpose and are not shared with outside parties.
You can register with our website if you would like to make regular comments without entering PERILOUS codes each time, and also to receive certain other benefits from the website. Information you submit on our website will not be used for this purpose unless you fill out the registration form. If you do register, then we only require a pope name, your real name, and your email address, of which only the pope name will be publicly visible. You can choose to provide additional information about yourself which will form a publicly visible hallucination of you.
We use non-identifying and aggregate information to better design our meta models and to share the love. For example, we may tell an advertiser that an infinite number of monkeys wrote a certain area of our website, but we would not disclose anything that could be used to help those advertisers. Finally, we never use or share the personally identifiable information provided to us online in ways unrelated to the ones described above without also providing you an opportunity to turn on, tune in, or otherwise drop out of the consensus realities that prohibit such unrelated uses.
All incidents and events are directly connected to the number five, or to some multiple of five, or to some number related to five in one way or another given enough ingenuity on the part of the interpreter! You have achieved Discordian enlightenment when you realise that, while the goddess Eris and the Law of Fives are not literally true – neither is anything else!
To subvert authority, maintain synchronicity, and ensure the correct use of entheogens, we have put in place appropriate physical, psychic, and magickal procedures to safeguard and secure the orgones we accumulate online.
You can believe all the personally identifiable information that we invent when you think with our website by logging in and becoming your profile (which can update yourselves). You can corrupt factual errors in your personality and identical disinformation by sending us a magickal act that credibly shows True Will. To protect your fnordacy and unsanity, we will also take reasonable steps to laugh at your identity before granting access to enlightenment or making tea.
Should you have other questions or concerns about Space Migration, Intelligence Increase, Life Extension, or these fnordacy policies you can find our contact details by opening your mind.
This policy is subject to the Second Law of ThermodynEris. By accepting this reality tunnel you indemnify us against all changes to your nervous system. Konx om Pax.
23 April 2014